Greg Proops's Vodka Flavored Vodka
Vodka is my alcoholic drink of choice. The reason behind this is because three of my favorite comedians drink mainly vodka: Greg Proops, Doug Benson, and Dan Harmon. Thus, I forced myself to take on vodka as affectation. It is like smoking a cigar, drinking whiskey, or objectifying women is for douche bags. My love of vodka eventually took hold and now it is my favorite drink. My partner's favorite drink is gin because of a deep love of Bowie in the movie the Man who fell to Earth. So I guess we are all children.
Liked gin, weird southern caricatures, and was an alien I think.
To me vodka is an elixir to the gods. Some very fun gods at that, ones that are super sexy and have fun parties with all of their vodkaey friends until Jesus, or someone like him, comes in and shuts them down because they didn't invite Jesus. I mean Jesus did have Mary Magdalene wash his feet with her hair which is pretty kinky but ever since his wife Karen left him he's been a major buzzkill. Vodka won World War 2. It kills Nazis which is good to keep in mind these days. Vodka is the end all be all and transcends even the most cliched phrases. Vodka is you and vodka is me.
Vodka is in all of us
My vodka of choice is called Our Detroit. It is a women's owned distillery in Detroit. By Detroit I do not mean Ann Arbor, or Ferndale, or white Troy, or whiter Livonia (that's a good southeastern Michigan reference that is mainly for me), or Dearborn, or Sterling, or either of the Heights version of either of those, or Mordor, and especially not Mareen. I mean actually in Detroit. This is something a liberal elitist asshole such as myself can support.
Liberal Elitist Asshole
This was a long introduction. Mercifully on to the ingredients.
Ingredients:
Your Vodka of choice I've made my opinion abundantly clear but I'm into people being able to make their own decisions so you pick anything even something shitty like Grey Goose.
Juice of half a lemon
Juice of half a lime using only have of your lemon and lime leaves you an extra half to spare so you can make another drink. You see how I thought ahead you you. You're welcome.
3 ice cubes not 2, not 3, and definitely not 28 we're not trying to sink the titanic here we're just making a drink
1 rocks glass because you look cool when you drink out of those unlike the martini glass where your last name has to be Bonds for you to look cool
Instructions:
1) Take rocks glass out of cupboard or more likely from table where you left it the last time you were drinking.
2) Place 3 ice cubes in rocks glass again not 2 or 4 or 28.
3) Cut lemon and lime in half and squeeze juice into rocks glass with 3 ice cubes.
4) Ouch don't do this if you have open wounds on your hands.
5) Fill the rocks glass and 3 ice cubes with said vodka.
6) Repeat if/when necessary.
7) Enjoy yourself life is hard and you deserve this, Jeff.
